Watching over you
by Evanescent Dementia
Summary: AU fic. The Valley of the End really was the end for one of the combatants. What do you do, when the one you love most is gone forever, how do you cope with the guilt? Flames are welcome, my house is cold. SasuNaru. If you squint and stand on your head.
1. A Departure

Glass shattered all over Konoha, cups cracked, spilling drinks, and mirrors shattered.

A dark omen to be sure.

The dark clouds that had before just loomed over the village, finally began to unload their cargo. Something was wrong with the world. The sky wept freezing tears, drenching all those unlucky enough to be caught outside.

Tsunade sat in the high-backed chair behind her fancy Hokage-office desk, gazing at the six cards in her hand.

The cards were lotto tickets. And all of them were winners of some sum or other. Except the sixth (she checked) one she had bought. One would think she'd be happy about this fact, ecstatic even, but Tsunade was grim. If one knew her, this would be understandable. You see, Tsunade, the Fifth Hokage, never won at gambling.

No, Tsunade had won twice before. The first time, she had won ten hands of poker and left with quite a large sum. The next day her little brother died on one of his first missions as a ninja.

The second time was years later, she received almost double the previous amount from several roulette games. On her mission a few days later her boyfriend died tragically, resulting in her severe case of hemophobia and her resigning from the active duty list in Konoha.

So, as you can imagine, Tsunade was extremely agitated. There was only one person that she truly cared about that was currently in danger.

That boy, Naruto, with his endearing grins, annoying loudness, and hair like the very sun that hid behind the clouds, was in danger. She could feel it.

Though Tsunade wanted to leap up from the sickening desk and dash to his aid, she _couldn't_. She knew for a fact that the moment she left the villages that were already eyeing Konoha would swoop down and devour it.

She also couldn't afford to send any more ninja after them. After Orochimaru's attack they were achingly, terrifyingly, despondently; shorthanded.

So she was stuck there, brooding, hoping, and also _praying_ that the blonde would come back alive.

Tsunade sighed and reached into the drawer to her left and pulled out the trusty friend that lay inside.

~.~.~.~.~.~

We stared at each other, standing on opposite sides of the river. We were both panting as we charged up our final attacks. His usually pale skin was tainted grey, with Orochimaru's curse, his hair, normally blue-black was also grayed slightly. Two (horrifying, repulsive) appendages that resembled (vaguely) wings stretched out behind him and he charged his new black and white Chidori.

The Kyuubi's chakra enveloped me in a red, shield, if you will. And though this chakra coating healed my battle injuries faster, I could feel my skin burning and my inner coils tightening painfully as the youki destroyed me from both the inside and out. _'There goes the Hokage dream.'_ I thought as I struggled to even create my Rasengan.

I looked into his (but they weren't) eyes, and I knew that I couldn't kill him. I couldn't bring myself to kill (eyes fading, blood everywhere, oh god) him. I would be the one to fall (die) this day.

I'm sorry Sakura-chan. I couldn't fulfill my promise. You should have asked someone better, like Kakashi-sensei. Someone like me isn't fit to help people.

I'm sorry Baa-san. You'll have to find someone else to succeed you. Shikamaru would be much better at it than me. Heh. Of course he'd need to get a lot stronger. I'm also sorry I wasn't able to keep your necklace.

I'm sorry, Iruka, I'll never be able to pay back my ramen debt to you. I could never be able to thank you enough. You pulled me out of the self destructive path I was on when you became my very first precious person.

We launched ourselves into the air, the distance quickly closing. I saw my death in those deceivingly cheerful sounding lightning flashes.

Our two attacks collided, sending a bright white light flashing around us. My eyes were sad as they looked his mutated ones.

I'm sorry Neji. My eyes weren't good enough to save him.

Sasuke brought about his other hand, chidori fully charged. I saw the other attack coming, but I was unable to stop it, my chakra system was in agony as the youki tore it apart.

There was no pain.

I looked into his eyes and smiled slightly, showing that I didn't blame him.

Then I was falling, I lifted my hand, (straining, so tired) and scraped my rapidly retreating claws over his hitae-ate.

My head cracked as I fell against the concrete, but still, there was the relieving sense of no pain.

My eyes flickered as I lay on the ground, There were only blurs, unidentifiable colors and shapes.

I heard his heavy (weary) footsteps, barely audible over the water fall.

A dark figure appeared in my vision, hovering over me.

"Naruto?" The voice was apprehensive, afraid I would miraculously heal and stop him, but at the same time, not wanting me to remain injured.

I coughed slightly, to get the blood out of my throat.

" I-I'm sorry S-Sasuke." I choked out as my vision dimmed once again.

"Dobe, what do you have to be sorry about." I heard him thump to his knees at my head.

"I c-couldn't save you." I was so tired. My eyes fluttered uselessly. (Fading)

"Maybe you'll get me next time." He sounded slightly frantic.

"My chakra system is d-destroyed." I coughed again, my every breath wheezing. (No Kyuubi to save me now)

"I'll come back. After I've defeated Itachi. We'll see each other then!" Sasuke insisted.

"Heh." I started to laugh, but coughing overtook it. "I can't see anything anymore." (so tired)

"You have to stop talking, you'll be fine, you always are!" he said, not wanting to accept it. "You have to be." I felt liquid fall on my already damp face. (When did it start raining?)

I moved my arm, (Sleep soon) I lifted it slightly, searching. I felt his hands catch mine. I sighed in contentment.

"Don't let Orochimaru control you Sasuke." My voice grew more steady as it grew fainter, and I felt him lean in to hear properly. "I want you to promise me something." I clutched his hand feebly.

"Anything." He said, conviction filling his voice.

"After you kill your brother, _go back to Konoha._" I emphasized these words, using the last of my strength. "Protect the village, Sasuke. All the villagers, not just our friends." He had to promise. I wouldn't be able to protect them, so he has to now.

"I promise." He said and I relaxed, sighing. I smiled slightly.

"Dn't ferget." I mumbled. I was almost gone now, the only thing keeping me here was his grip on my hand.

More water drops hit my face and I smiled lightly, I'm glad it rained today, I love the rain.

"S'not your fault y'know." I mumbled. But if he answered, I didn't hear, because I was gone.

~.~.~.~.~

" Yes it is, Naruto." I heard him sigh deeply and his hand went slack in mine. I rested my forehead against his. He didn't answer. "Naruto?" He wasn't breathing. "Naruto!" I shook him lightly. "This isn't time for jokes." (my fault, my fault, my fault!) Naruto didn't move.

It was only then that the rain fell on the Valley of the End.

~.~.~.~

I raced trough the treetops, praying that I wasn't too late. I had just gotten back from an A-rank mission when I found out about Sasuke. I rushed after them immediately, Pakkun guiding the way.

"It doesn't smell too good Kakashi. I smell a lot of Naruto's blood." Pakkun said gently. I found a speed I didn't know I had and raced time.

But somehow, I knew I was already too late.

I arrived at the Valley and saw the destruction the two had wrought during their battle.

All was still now.

I saw a bright, orange-clad figure standing near the waterfall. It could have been a trick of my mind or the light, but it looked like Naruto was glowing. And see-through. But that couldn't be.

Could it?

Naruto turned towards me.

"Naruto! Are you alright?" I tried to call over the roaring water. He didn't seem to hear me. He waved at me, smiling, then turned and disappeared.

I started to run towards him, but stopped at the sight that greeted me.

"Oh, Naruto…" I sighed. Yet another person who had died under my watch. I scooped up his body, carefully, not wanting to damage it further. In his hand, as if someone had put it there, was a hitae-ate, with one, long slash over the leaf symbol.

You seemed so, well, lasting, Naruto. It felt like you would be here forever, smiling, laughing, and yelling at me for being late.

Now you're gone.

Never to smile. No more laughing. Never to make grand claims of becoming the Hokage.

I pulled his body closer to mine, clutching it hopelessly.

I regret it, Naruto. I regret.

Spending all that time on Sasuke, training him. I left you to fend for yourself. You did well though. Leave it to you to find a Sannin to teach you.

If only.

~.~.~.~

I walked through this immense white void, looking for….What? Where was I going? Where was Shikamaru? Kiba? Neji? Naruto? Were they alright? Did we catch Sasuke?

"You know," spoke an quiet voice that should have been yelling boisterously. "You should turn back."

Naruto?

I looked around, there! He was sitting farther up the path, one leg dangling over an unseen edge while the other was drawn up to his chest, his arms around it.

"Why?" I asked him.

"There's more for you back there, that what awaits you further on." He said, glancing behind me. "Besides, Shikamaru's waiting for you to return."

"Where will you go?" I asked him, hoping he'd come with me.

"Oh, I have to go on ahead. But I'll wait for you, alright?" He said, smiling a quiet smile.

"Alright then." I said doubtfully. "See you soon…" I said, beginning to turn around.

"No offense meant, Choujii, but I honestly hope not. Make sure you keep Ino for starving herself. Also, make sure Shika doesn't get too lazy." He laughed softly.

I turned, leaving. When I had walked a few paces, I heard his voice again.

"Oh, and Chouji! Tell Shika," he stopped for a moment, as if deliberating. "Tell him he'd make a great Hokage." I whirled around, suddenly comprehending.

No. It couldn't be. But…He was always the strongest of us…

~.~.~.~

"You're going the wrong way." A voice stopped me from my walking.

"How would you know?" I asked Naruto, turning to look at him.

"Wow, those eyes of yours really are good for nothing." He grinned impudently, but suddenly sobered. "But really, you should turn around. TenTen-chan is crying. Can't you hear her?" I concentrated. I could vaguely hear someone crying.

"Yeah… But…." I hesitated. I wanted to comfort my teammate, but I was also so tired, and it was such a long way back…"I was told to walk this way." What?

"By who?" he asked, (not so) subtly turning me around.

"I-I don't know." Who was it?

"Well, the was I was, the great Neji Hyuuga doesn't take orders from anyone, so why start now? And also, you still have things you need to do mister." He was right. (Oddly)

"Alright…" I said, starting to walk the other way.

"Protect your teammates, Neji-san. They're the most precious friends you'll have." I nodded, agreeing with this statement.

"Oh, and Neji. Take care of Hinata-chan for me." His voice sounded a bit sad.

"Why don't you do it yourself?" I asked him curiously.

"I would, but as it turns out, your eyes are stronger than mine." I turned around, but he was gone. I started walking back the way I came, even though my legs grew heavy and it was hard to move, I kept going.

Naruto had given me a mission.


	2. A Remembering

**HELLO ALL MY WONDERFULLY FANTASTIC READERS!!**

**Yeah, so I need a new heart.... -glances at bloddy lump lying a few feet away- this chapter kinda ripped mine out...**

**Anyway, I own nothing, for I am poor. As a doormat. For doormats are poor creatures indeed.**

**Whelp, this chapter is dedicated to my wonderfully-wonderful friend Iz. And her Amv's of doomy-doom**

**AUTHOR AWAY!!!!**

I arrived at the gate to the village, still holding the limp body of my student. I walked through the village, rain (tears) running down my face. I made my way up to the Hokage offices, trying not to look at the monument where his face would never rest.

I entered the office, people moving out of my way when they saw the burden in my arms.

Shizune, who had been waiting at the door to the office, started foreward.

"Naruto!?" she cried desperately. I looked up at her, and shook my head sadly. Her hand went to her mouth and she sobbed quietly.

I pushed my way through the large set of doors, careful not to jostle Naruto's body. Tsunade had been standing at the window, staring out at the rain that wouldn't let up. At my entrance, she turned.

She seemed to float as she fell to the ground, the cards held in her hand scattered across the floor, and she remained on her knees, tears falling down her face.

~.~.~.~

I was sitting outside the intensive care unit, waiting (hoping) anxiously. A nurse had come briefly to properly splint my finger, but left soon after.

My first time leading a mission and this had to happen.

I didn't even know if we had succeeded or not, or what had become of my blond teammate.

I got up and paced for a while, then sat back down. Let them be all right. Just, please, let them be all right. Please.

~.~.~.~

Once I got to the compound I was received with open arms. Orochimaru himself welcomed me into his headquarters, he wore a new skin, but his creepy-as-hell eyes gave him away.

Three years.

That's all the time Naruto's giving me to get stronger, and kill my brother.

And I would do it.

Then, I would return to Konoha, if they'd still have me, and protect them, like he asked.

(Myfaultmyfault)

Naruto…You weren't supposed to die!

You were supposed to be indestructible.

You should have been able to heal yourself!

I used to look back on you and smirk at how useless you were, but then, at the bridge, when we fought Haku, somehow you defeated him.

I thought it was a fluke at first… But then, in the Chunnin Exams you fought, yes, you _fought_! You weren't affected by the bloodlust. I began to see you getting closer and closer to me.

Then, one day, I looked back, and you were gone, you stood in front of me now, proudly strong, as you head-bashed your way to victory against Gaara of the Sand.

YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO DIE!!!

'_Hey! Teme! Get stronger alright! Then one day you can beat me!' _The obnoxious voice broke through my reverie. I looked around for the source.

I saw nothing.

~.~.~.~

"You can't do this!" Iruka yelled at the council of elders.

"We most certainly can. That monster's name will not defile the KIA stone. We will not tolerate it." A man spoke up, his voice laden with hate.

"Naruto was a ninja _devoted_ to this village's safety, he **died** trying to bring back your exalted Uchiha! At least show him a little respect in his, in his…" Iruka broke off, tears streaming down his face. Kakashi put an arm around him, drawing him into himself.

Tsunade remained silent, staring down at her clasped hands, unmoving.

"Hokage-sama, please!" Iruka made one desperate plea towards her.

"Enough!" Tsunade shouted, standing suddenly. She made to leave the room.

"Hokage-sama, where…?" One of the council-men asked.

She halted, half turning back towards them.

"I will do what is right." She said. The council members smiled smugly around at each-other, content with their victory. "I will give Naruto the respect that he so rightly deserves." It was then that the old bags began to smell something was wrong, other than their old-person diapers, I mean.

They followed her, the council members and the congregated jounin and chuunin as well.

Tsunade led them all the way to the KIA memorial stone before she stopped, drawing out a kunai. Then, with the speed and strength only a ninja could have, struck out towards the stone, carving out in quick succession the two words that nearly gave the council-members heartfailure.

"_**Naruto Uzumaki"**_

"Tsunade!" One of the council members spluttered.

"That's 'Hokage-sama' to you. That boy possessed a stronger Will of Fire than any other ninja I have ever known. You are blinded by your own arrogance. DON'T try to tell me what to do." Tsunade never once raised her voice, speaking with a quiet rage that sent the council members scurrying from her presence. Tsunade stood there for awhile, with Jiriaya, Kakashi, and Iruka. Tsunade tore her eyes from the stone, looking down at her feet.

"Are you alright?" Jiraiya asked softly.

"No…" Tsunade choked out, letting herself be weak for a moment, she cried into his shoulder.

~.~.~.~

The day cleared up as it wore on, making perfect weather for the memorial service, bright and cloud-less, the sky reflecting a clear, magnanimous blue. The people of the village were busy festooning the streets with ribbons and flower garlands. The coming celebration promised to rival even the October 10th festival. The narrow-minded villagers hummed as they worked, setting up game booths and preparing fireworks.

Near the center of the village lay a pocket of quiet, no outside noise seemed able to penetrate the deep sadness cocooned around the site of the memorial. Tsunade stood in front of the congregation, a solemn expression on her weary face. Jiraiya stood, not far off, watching over her. Shizune hovered somewhat behind the blonde woman. It was not clear whether she thought to try to catch the woman if her legs gave out, of to draw comfort from her mentor. Occasionally Shizune would reach out to touch the woman's sleeve, of clasp the edge of her black mourning coat, signs pointing to the latter.

Sakura stood near the front, crying her eyes out as Ino comforted her, there was nary an insult or a rude gesture passed between the two. Kakashi stood on his remaining student's right, patting a sobbing Iruka on the back as the dolphin clung to him, the scarecrow's face a mask of sorrow and regret.

Shikamaru stood on Sakura's left, hovering between a wheel-chair bound Choujii and a sniffling Ino, making damn sure that his teammates were safe and unharmed.

Kiba and Shino held Hinata close as she cried disconsolately, even harder than Sakura, as she held a whimpering Akamaru tight.

Mr. Ichiraku had his arm around Ayame, looking on as they stood near the back of the congregation, mourning the loss of the little boy who he had come to think of as a son. His ramen bar would always be closed on this day, the day of Naruto's death.

Team Ten stood near the (now) Rookie Seven, Neji also confined to a wheel-chair. TenTen stood behind him, clutching the handles tighttighttight in a white-knuckled grasp, her eyes puffy and red. She had come to like the blonde boy who had beaten some sense into her crush's head. Lee stood next to Gai, crying real tears, not the happy ones he and his Idol were fond of sprouting.

And though Gai could of considered this a win for him, that he had managed to keep all of his students alive and loyal to the village, the thought never even crossed his mind, just sorrow at the loss of one so full of youth as Naruto.

The Sand Trio stood near Lee, but not exactly close enough to be considered associated with them. Gaara stood in front of his siblings, gazing at the Portrait of his fellow Jinchurikii, with something that could almost be considered sadness. If A streak of moisture fell down his cheeks, hey, the weather in Konoha was fickle. It was probably just a bit of rain. Right?

Behind and above them all preside GamaBunta with GamaKichi sitting on his head, sniffing occasionally, as they sat on some poor (stupid) villager's home.

There would be no grave for their fallen comrade, no tombstone where his friends and allies could visit every once in awhile and cry over.

For you see, shinobi are never buried, for burying a shinobi would leave behind a corpse that and enemy ninja could examine to find out secrets of the village to use against Konoha. Instead every ninja, upon death, is cremated, and their ashes scattered to the wind. Every shinobi must accept this fact before they so much as become a gennin.

There were no words spoken at Naruto's memorial. No sad speeches about his greatness, and what he could have been. They all knew how great he was, and what he _would've_ become. They all felt, by unspoken agreement, that to speak on his death, and his life, would somehow tarnish his memory.

Every person there wanted to remember him grinning foolishly and speaking words that many thought were too brash for him to follow through with.

But they had all believed that he would prove the doubters wrong.

Eventually Tsunade handed the jar to GamaKichi, a single tear falling down her face.

"Someplace _sunny_." She rasped through a throat scoured by grief. The little frog nodded sadly, then regained his spot on his father's head, and they disappeared, off to find an appropriate spot to scattered the ashes of the only mortal to ever touch their hearts.

"Well." Said a shockingly, achingly, impossibly familiar voice. "You guys sure know how to make a body feel missed." They all, spun to face the speaker, almost daring to hope…


	3. A Return

**This chapter is dedicated to my reviewers!!!**

**Just knowing that people took time out of thier day to read the emotional train wreck that I call a story fills me with an unsrestrained, thirst-quenching joy. (don't ask me how that works, 'cause I don't know.)**

**Disclaimer: Once again I own nothing..... Wish I did though. That would make my life a beautiful thing. All characters belong to the wonderfully-fantastical Kishimoto.**

This white expanse was endless, silence ruling the pure void. I hesitated to speak in case I shattered the frail peace.

'_Who goes…' _The words were not spoken aloud, but whispered into my mind, caressing my psyche. The white rippled with color, fantastical designs swirling into existence, like someone dropping food dye into a vat of white paint. Then, the color vanished, leaving only the white behind.

"My name is Uzumaki Naruto." The words tumbled from my lips without my having to shape them; they appeared in my mouth and tumbled out, like children eager for candy. The words, visible, danced around me before zooming off into the distance, causing black ripples in the white expanse.

'_Why have you come here Usumaki Naruto?'_ The voice was beautiful, like a siren's call, calming my spirit, while at the same time exciting the abyss around me into magnificent colors. The colors, oh, the colors, there were reds, blues, purples and greens, every color you could imagine, and some you couldn't, never even seen in the mortal world.

…mortal…world?

Wait…

SASUKE!!

Sakura!

Kakashi!

Baa-chan!

I was dead, and I was leaving everyone behind.

I had to get back.

"I do not know why I have come here, but I know that I must go back." I finally answered the voice, a new determination in my own voice. Again the words danced around, creating ripples in this white world that paled in comparison to my own.

'_Are you sure? You could rest here, you know, forget all the troubles of the world of men…'_ The voice enticed me, tempting me into giving in. But I resisted, there were people waiting for me, and I had promises to keep.

"I must go back." I said, looking around, searching for a way back to my world, back to my precious people.

Back to Sasuke.

'_Then wake Uzumaki Naruto, but know, we shall meet again.'_

~.~.~.~

I woke.

It took me a moment to realize where I was, I stood above a gathering of my precious people, all dressed in black.

My funeral.

But no matter how much I wanted to stay, to try and comfort them, assure them we would meet again, I could not.

I sensed there was someone who needed me more.

So off I flew, my insubstantial body drifting through the sky. I had the uniqe experience of being able to watch the scenery below me through my own body. It was disconcerting to say the least.

I had to find Sasuke.

~.~.~.~

Naruto was dead.

I couldn't process this.

The boy who's eyes reflected my own pain.

The boy who swore to kill me if I tried to harm his precious people.

The boy who had **beaten** some humanity into me.

He was gone.

Just….GONE.

There was no way that Naruto could have been killed by a mere human, I don't care how powerful his hickey was.

It just wasn't possible.

So when I heard the voice behind me, I wasn't surprised, he must have found a way to trick everyone, to fake his own death.

How wrong I was.

~.~.~.~

"NARUTO!!" Iruka cried, flinging himself at the boy he viewed as a son.

"Careful there, or you'll make me disappear before my mission's done."

They froze, trying to process this information.

**A! Ha Ha Ha Ha.**

**I'm a Horrible person. I know.**

**I rose your hopes and dashed them excellently.**

**(Ha Ha Rachel. Ha Ha.)**

**So I updated so fast because I was mildly afraid that my friend Rachel would actually grow a spine, then beat me with said spine. **

**That's what you get.**

**You get a cliffhanger.**

**-mutters- Force me to update early will you.**


	4. A Second Goodbye

**Here you are guys! Hot off the press! Do you have any idea how many school rules I'm breaking to get this to you?**

**Seriously though guys, if I was inclined to start a religion, I would start one around my reviewers. **

**And Anime. **

**Reviewers and Anime.**

**Disclaimer: I am Hobo-esque in my poorness. I own nothing aside from a pack of gum and a five subject notebook that contains my soul (read: all my stories)**

**So please don't go suing me.**

"Kage bunshin." Jiraiya murmured.

"How…?" Kakashi asked.

"Right before Kyuubi's chakra overtook my, er, _Naruto's_ system, he created me, imbuing me with all of his normal chakra. He knew there was a good chance he wouldn't make it our alive. That's why it took me so long to get here, I had to walk or risk wasting chakra." The doppelganger said.

You mentioned a mission." Sakura spoke up in a watery voice.

"Very good Sakura-chan, no wonder you're the smartest of us." Sakura tried a smile, but it came out as a more pained expression. "Naruto created me to impart his last words, and to tell you where to look."

"Where to look for what?" Tsunade asked impatiently.

"Patience, Baa-chan, I'm getting to that." Tsunade winced, but did not begrudge him the nickname, instead she savored it. "First, to Sakura." The pinkette looked up./ "I'm sorry I couldn't keep my promise." Sakura cried all the harder, for she realized, that if she hadn't made him promise what she did, that her teammate may have still be alive.

"I'm sorry Baa-chan, I couldn't hold on to the necklace, but let me be clear on something, my death is my own fault, I couldn't kill Sasuke, so I died. I would have died even if he didn't put a Chidori through me. The fox's chakra was destroying me from the inside out, it was just quicker this way. No stupid curse killed me." A few tears fell down the old woman's face. "I need you to promise me something Tsunade-san." She looked up, shocked at the name.

"Anything." She whispered fervently through a hoarse throat.

"Don't make Sasuke a missing-nin." Tsunade balked, of all things he could have asked.

"I can't do that!" Tsunade shook her head, she refusedto let that bastard back into her village. Kiba and Akamaru let out twin beast-like snarls at the very thought. Gaara's face was overcome with an expression reminiscent of his earlier days. Even shy Hinata looked enraged.

"Please, Tsunade, I made him promise, that in three years time he would return, to protect my precious people now that I can't." Naruto's sad eyes pierced him.

"…Fine. But he'll be on probation." Tsunade said. She would take savage pleasure in assigning him D-rank missions for the rest of his life.

"Iruka-sensei, sorry I was such a horrible student, and that I couldn't repay my ramen bill. What is to be found now belongs to you." Iruka looked confused, but nodded anyway, bravely wiping away his tears, as Kakashi hugged him close. "Hinata-chan, don't let your cousin push you around anymore, and make sure he doesn't get a big head. He's prone to them." The girl nodded her head, miserable, he grinned at her.

It seemed to her as if the tears would never stop, as she kept imagining what might have been.

"Take care of her." He looked into Kiba and Shino's eyes fiercely. They met his eyes and nodded solemnly.

"Neji, your eyes are better than mine, I trust you to keep those eyes of yours on Sasuke when he gets back, okay?"

"The Uchiha will stay in the village, whether he likes it or not." Neji said grimly.

"Thanks, man. And Gaara, don't you _dare_ revert back to the way you were, or I'll have to come back from the afterworld just to kick your ass." Gaara smirked, something that could almost be considered a smile. Almost.

"That sounds like a challenge, Uzumaki." Naruto only grinned again.

"Jiraiya." Naruto beckoned his teacher closer. The Sannin obeyed, bending down a bit to hear as Naruto whispered in his ear. A moment passed before a light, perverted, blush blossomed on his cheeks, as if Naruto had told him of a secret passage into the women's bath.

But that couldn't be, because Naruto wasn't that type of boy.

So it had to be something else.

"Now, I knew that the villagers didn't like me, and that my apartment could be ransacked at any moment. So I hid my most precious possessions somewhere safe." The people gathered were of mixed emotions. Some were shocked and confused; (they didn't know) others were proud of his foresight, but angry at the villagers' nearsightedness. But all assembled were sad that someone so young had to be so strong, when they now knew how heavy a burden he carried.

"Where did you hide them?" Jiraiya finally asked.

"Now that wouldn't be any fun at all! No, you have to search for it! But I'll give you a hint." A prankster until the end, Naruto couldn't resist one last joke.

"This child's friend,

To and fro

From where I watched

What I could not have."

Naruto spoke slowly, making sure they could understand. "Now my stay will not last much longer, and this truly will be the last I say to you." He looked each of them in the eye, some were able to meet his cerulean gaze, and others looked away. "Take care of each other."

And then Uzumaki Naruto was gone in a flash of smoke.

The loss hit them, twice as hard as the first time.

Any hope that they may have harbored, that Naruto was really coming back, was gone now, as fleeting as that last burst of smoke.

Tomorrow, they would get back to their lives, tomorrow they would be strong. But today, today they needed to hold their loved ones tighttighttight, and to grieve for 'if onlys' and 'what might have beens'

That night, during the villager's festival a few men got drunk and set fire to an apartment complex, killing themselves and six others.

And just like that, the last physical trace of the boy was gone. All that was left of the monster, (the hero) was memories of laughter, and little clues scattered like leaves in the coming autumn.

**I'm sorry it took so long, I had planned to update over the weekend, but I forgot to print out the chapter and take it home for revising, but in a foolish bout of idiocy, I left it on my school's computer.**

**So here I am.**

**During lunch.**

**Drawing out my AN to piss of Rachel.**

**She just makes it too easy.**

**(Yes, Rachel, it is up now.)**

**Ha Ha**

**~_"It seems life is all about ass, whether you're kissing it, kicking it, laughing it off, or just, in fact, being one."~_**

**Ta-Ta you wonderful people you.**


	5. A Dream

**I Apologize, my beautiful people, for this chapter's atrocious lateness. I just now got around to touching up the chapter. I know you guys hate excuses, but, that's the truth. **

**Anyway.**

**During my brief lapse of updation, I came across an... _interesting_ fact. Apparently, in the zillionth chapter of the Naruto manga, (Which I do not own, by the way, see earlier rant about doormat poorness) Sasuke-bastard made Gaara, (_Gaara!)_ cry.**

**Yes. **

**You read me correctly. (I apologize for the spoiler.)**

**Oh, _yes_. Shit's about to get _real_ ugly for Sasuke. **

**Remember, children, The Bunny sees all. And he judges harshly. **

**For you see, the Bunny deals in Karma.**

**Sasuke will get his.**

_The attacks met_

_White light, blazing brighter than the sun._

_Second attack, piercing through layer of crimson, then_

_**Flesh**_

_The sickening feeling of a hand (my fault, my fault)_

_Going through a friend_

_A brother._

_To feel a heart stutter _

_then __**slow**__._

_To hear words, not condemning, but apologizing._

_Understanding._

_Last breath (oh god)_

_**Gone…**_

'_There's no reason for you to be here, Sasuke.'_

_Voice…_

_Calling… (but you're gone)_

Do I deserve to follow?

'_Come.'_

_I went._

_~.~.~.~_

The sun shone down on Team Seven's Training grounds.

The weather was perfect, perfect in a way that you just _know_ that it couldn't be real.

There was Naruto, perched upon the log that he was once tied to not so long ago, (feels like forever) gazing at the sky, reflecting his eyes. Or was it the other way around?

"You're not real." I told the boy, my friend (did I have the right to call him that?)

"How do you know?" Thos blue eyes looked at me, no, _through_ me.

"I'm dreaming." Though I should know this, I could tell that deep down I still hoped, (My fault) and I tried to ignore the fact that his voice sounded so real, like I could reach out and touch him.

"But why does that mean it can't be real?" then he grinned that grin that made me remember the old days, before jealousy and departures and fights to the death.

Before last breath, (gone silent).

The _silence._

"This is just my mind playing tricks on me, feeding off my guilt to create this illusion." I hopped up onto the log beside his, might as well get comfortable in my delusions.

"Well, this is new." Naruto said wonderingly, looking at the sky again.

"What?" I asked, irritated, my own gaze trailing to the sky as well.

"The Great Uchiha Genius has actually admitted he did something wrong." Naruto grinned, dodging the half-hearted punch I threw his way.

"Oh, shut up." I muttered, reveling in his answering laugh. It sounded so _real_; I wanted it to be real.

"But seriously, I don't blame you." His smile turned sad. "Now, you need to wake up."

~.~.~.~

My eyes flew open, startling Kabuto, who was just entering the room to wake me up.

"So you do sleep with one eye open." Kabuto's laugh was mirthless and false, reminding me of one that was true and full of joy. (Silent evermore.) "Master Orochimaru wishes to see you, your training starts today.

I stood up, stretching, clearing the dream from my mind. It was just a dream, nothing more, and nothing less.

~.~.~.~

The training was brutal.

I was fighting Orochimaru himself, at his full strength.

I lasted less than a minute, before he beat me into unconsciousness.

I truly was weak.

Blackness surrounded me, and I could not move my limbs.

Someone sighed.

Then my head was resting on something soft, warm arms cradling my head. My wounds burned slightly as warm hands brushed over them, soothing the raw pain.

Warm red pierced the blackness as I saw the imaginary sun through my closed eyes. "I'd tell you to be more careful, but I guess you can't help it, fighting with snake-face." My 'pillow' said. Even though I was surprised, (why would He want to comfort me?) I couldn't move away, or even summon the strength to want to.

Besides, it was so warm here.

"Wake up Sasuke, you can't stay here forever."

~.~.~.~

A week had passed.

Anko, Ibiki, Kakashi, Iruka, Jiraiya, Shizune and Tsunade were all gathered in the Hokage office.

They had gathered to unravel the clue left behind.

"Where did Uzumaki spend his childhood?" Ibiki asked, rubbing a particularly large scar on his cheek. "Assuming that the child in the riddle is him."

"Well, when he wasn't ditching, he spent time at the academy." Iruka said, still looking depressed. He had taken leave of the Ninja Academy. A mental health leave.

"Then that's where we'll start." Tsunade said firmly.

~.~.~.~

For a full day they scoured the academy grounds for clues, disrupting many a class of ninja hopefuls.

"Maybe we're going about this wrong." Kakashi mused, pulling out his book. Iruka was about to scold him for reading his porn at a time like this, then he saw that Kakashi had taped a copy of the riddle inside the explicit novel.

"We've looked everywhere in the academy, there's nothing there!" Iruka flopped down onto the couch next to the scarecrow.

The two had become very close since Naruto's passing, comforting each other. They'd become friends.

"So Naruto is the child, who were his friends?" Kakashi asked.

"Well," here Iruka scratched the scar on his nose. (Embarrassed) "He didn't really have any friends, back in the academy. The kids had picked up on their parent's animosity and shunned him. Every friend he has now, he fought tooth and nail for. Back then he always just watched the other kids playing, while he sat on the swing." It was silent for a few moments, before they jolted to their feet.

"I thought of it!" they said in tandem. Then zoomed off at speeds only to best of ninja could achieve.

They appeared at the academy playground, striding through the empty lot, devoid of children due to the encroaching night.

They both stared at the swing, as if waiting for Naruto to pop up and smack them in the face with a clue. (Seems like something he would pull)

They looked at each other, then back at the swing.

"Better start." Kakashi said rationally.

"Yeah…" Iruka answered. They began examining the swing, even the tree it was attached to. They struck gold when Kakashi turned over the seat.

There, carved into the wood in clumsy writing, was their next clue.

'FolloW KaKaSHI's AdViCE.'

The two of them re-read the short clue what must have been a dozen times, before cutting the wooden plank loose, and taking it with them, off to Tsunade's office.

~.~.~.~.~

"Why do I always end up here?" I asked, half to myself, half to the boy seated next to me.

"Don't look at me. This is _your_ inner world, not mine." Naruto looked peaceful, his eyes closed, arms folded behind his head.

"What do you mean?" I asked, curious.

"This is the place you want to be the most. So your inner world reflects it. Say, if we were in my world, we'd be at the ramen bar." His expression grew wistful. "That's one of the things I've missed most about being alive."

"Dobe."

"Teme."

The words held no malice or anger, just playful bantering.

Oh, how I wished for this to be real.

Now it was all just (dreadful, terrible, _aching_) silence.

**Now I leave you there. Till next instalment of SASUKE'S PUNISHMENT!!!! -evil laugh-**

**Now we've had our daily dose of insanity, (loss of sleep and 2 monster energy drinks ((Don't own!)). You should try it.)**

**Anyway, I'm not sure if I like this chapter all that much.**

**I'm pretty sure I mad duck-butt too emo.**

**He just pisses me right-the-hell off.**

**Poor Naru-chan. -huggles-**

**I live upon your praise. Or critisism. Either way. Flames are welcome!!!**


	6. A Finding

**I realize that I am a horrible person for taking so long, and that excuses are meaningless, but I recently discovered the Mortal Instrument trilogy, and have been consumed within it's pages. If you haven't read them, try to get your mits on the first book "City of Bones" it a good read. **

**Warning: This chapter has not been proof-read, I wanted to get it up as fast as I could. This was a product of an all-nighter and coffee-flavored monsters, there might be typos in this working. Be cautious for they are armed with sporks, and mayonaise.**

**Disclaimer: -turns out pockets- I spent all my money on our school band's 1$ candy bar fundraiser. Damn them for carrying around sweet, sweet chocolate. I am weak. But I got revenge by paying them all in pennies and nickles! Mwaha! And then I was sick. Because I am allergic to the chocolaty goodness.**

**TO THE INTERNET!!!!!!**

**~.~.~.~.~**

"This makes no sense!" Sakura tugged her hair hard. (But not too hard) Ino nodded her agreement to the statement.

Everyone in the group was listed among Naruto's precious people. Iruka and Kakashi sat side-by-side in the high stools, looking glumly down at the steaming bowls of ramen. Sakura sat on the ground near Kakashi, not caring if she got dirty. Ino sat near her. Tsunade sat next to an empty seat beside Iruka. The seat was left reverently empty with a bowl of steaming miso ramen sitting on the counter in front of it. Shizune stood behind her mentor, holding TonTon in her arms.

Teams Eight and Ten were missing from their number. Gai and Lee were running around the village a couple hundred times and TenTen was helping Neji get back in shape after his injury. Hinata had not left her room for a few weeks now. Not even fear of her father could coax her out. Meals were left outside the door, and there they remained. Kiba and Shino came by often to talk to her through the door and try to tempt her out of her solitude.

Shikamaru sat on Kakashi's other side, cross-legged on the stool (no one asked how he managed it) his hands clasped in hes thinking pose, with his eyes closed Asuma and Chouji stood near the boy, trying not to disturb his thinking.

Iruka poked at his own bowl of chicken ramen, no appetite to speak of.

"Alright Kakashi, just start spouting advice." Tsunade commanded.

"Now? But I can't just-"

"Do it!" Tsunade snapped at the Copy Ninja.

"Um, uh…. Try not to wake up on fire." Kakashi hesitantly said.

They all just stared at him. Even TonTon looked affronted.

"Really Kakashi?" Iruka monotoned. "Really?"

"I told you I couldn't give advice on the spot."

Tsunade rubbed her temples. "Ugh, just tell us all of the advice you've given to _Naruto._" Kakashi thought for a moment, trying to recall.

"Eat more vegetables, ramen is bad for you. Those who forsake their friends are scum. Look underneath the underneath, make sure you wear a belt on missions." Kakashi went on for awhile.

"Stop!" Shikamaru said. "That's it!" He jumped from his stool, racing off.

"Wait!" Sakura called before giving chase.

~.~.~.~.~

For the first time since the battle (his death) I did not have a nightmare. Instead I went straight to the sunny training ground of my 'inner world'.

Except it wasn't sunny, the sky was overcast and grey. Naruto, from his spot on the grass beside me looked up at the grey expanse sadly.

"What's wrong, Sasuke?" The boy asked.

"What makes you think something's wrong?" I asked defensive.

"It's about to rain." Naruto said, appearing to change the subject. Then it proceeded to do just that. The two boys sat in the light downpour, silent, as the precipitation chilled them.

"Why are you here, Naruto?" I needed to know, if this was just a pathetic dream of, no it was too ludicrous to even consider. (Can it be real?)

"You needed me." Naruto shrugged, dismissive. That was an answer that I could have thought up, a half-assed, pansy answer. It proved nothing.

"When have I ever needed you." I scoffed, inwardly cursing that damn Uchiha pride. But Naruto just laughed, instead of yelling at me, like he would have if-

"How about that time in the Forest of Death?" I looked away, remembering how Naruto had saved me from the giant snake. His eyes had been so _red._ " Then again when we fought Zabuza the first time." I remembered. Naruto's plan to release Kakashi had worked, and ended up saving our lives. "then when I fought off Gaara." The memory still rankled.

I was silent for a few moments.

"But seriously, I'm haunting you, jerk," He turned to smirk at me. "feel honored."

Then the training ground melted away, as I awoke, though his eyes _**(Eyes)**_ seemed to still look at me when I opened them, and I thought I heard a ghostly laugh.

But, surely, it was just the wind?

~.~.~.~.~

They had followed Shikamaru back to the academy, racing through the corridors to the playground in back, causing many teachers to peer, disgruntled, out at them.

Shikamaru stopped where the two ropes, that no longer held a swing, still hung. "Kiba, use your Gatsuuga to dig a hole there, stopping approximately three feet down." The Chuunin ordered.

Kiba, who had learned, (the hard way) that Shikamaru wasn't the type to just give orders for no reason, immediately began the series of hand signs while the rest of the group hurriedly backed away.

Kiba preformed the spinning attack, digging into the ground, gouging the dirt out of a hold two feet in diameter. After a few moments, he stopped, climbing out. Shikamaru jumped into the hole and started digging with a kunai, displaying more effort than he had in a long time.

'**Clang!'**

Shikamaru paused, before striking the same spot again with his kunai.

'**Clang!'**

He smirked, pocketing his Kunai, digging his hands into the soil. He pulled up a metal box, jumping from the hole. Everyone gathered around the Chuunin inspecting the box.

The box made of a dark metal, the same as a Kunai. Anti-violence jutsu were used on the box so you couldn't force it open, and the hinges were on the inside, to avoid it being opened that way. A few minutes were spent brushing the dirt and grime off of the container. It was Iruka who felt the abrasions first. They were carved into the bottom of the box, again in their blonde's shaky handwriting.

"_A KeY IS in nEEd, _

_For whAt iS found_

_AlwAys in thE SEalEr'S SiGht_

_HE who broke it'S fErociouS miGht_

_Savior to all, yEt condEmnEr to onE."_

**~.~.~.~.~**

**The next chapter be dedicated to anyone who guesses the riddle correctly! **

**To Pein and Taisi: Your guesses do not count because i believe I might have told you already. I do not remember, I've probably slept since then.**

**I need to go throw up now, Iz fed me chocolate........**

**(-looks around- Why yes Rachel, it _is _up now. I hadn't noticed.)**


	7. A New Discovery

** you are all truly wonderful people. Truly.**

**This chapter is dedicated to Shodaime, for their fantastically correct answer of my riddle. I should really make these things harder. But I'm –lazy-, magnificently so. Anyway, I'm still poor as a doormat because the bandy-fundraiser is –still- going on. I'm wondering if a person actually **_**needs **_**a stomach. I'm considering having mine removed.**

**I would also take this time to commend an anonymous reviewer going by the name 'loveless' for submitting the most nonsensical review I have ever received. Congrats.**

**I hope you all are happy with it, for it caused me much mental trauma.**

**Explanation is below.**

**~.~.~.~.~**

Asuma was seriously starting to worry about Shikamaru. Sure, the boy spends all his time staring at clouds and muttering about how troublesome people are, but this was going over the top.

Asuma was just going about his daily business, going to meet Kurenai for a date, when a horde of people, led by Shikamaru ran past, on their way to an unknown location.

Asuma blinked.

Shikamaru…

Running anywhere.

While not on a mission.

Asuma immediately told Kurenai that he had to cancel their date, because the world was ending, and asked her to please remember to protect her home from the rain of fire to come, then he went home and hid himself in his closet.

A couple hours later, finding himself not dead, (and quite hungry as a matter of fact) Asuma emerged from his hiding spot.

Then, once again, blinked, looking up.

"Hey…Shikamaru…..What'cha doin'?" He hesitated to ask, almost certain that he didn't want to know.

Shikamaru was sitting cross-legged, hands in his thinking pose.

On his celing.

"Naruto left behind a series of clues, leading us to his hidden belongings; I'm trying to figure out this next clue." Shikamaru said, not opening his eyes.

"I gathered you were thinking about something, but why did you feel the need to do your thinking _here._ On my bedroom ceiling?" Asuma asked the boy. Shikamaru shrugged.

"I find I think better here."

**.**

**.**

**.**

"Alright then, I'm-I'm just gonna leave now. Make sure you lock up when you're done." Shikamaru had already closed his eyes, but he made a noncomittical noise. Asuma, deciding that that was indeed all he was going to get, wisely chose not to press him and instead, left.

~.~.~.~.~

Naruto sighed, staring up at the grey sky. The training area around him was starting to lose all the color, becoming like the sky, in monochrome grey.

"Soon, I will have to leave this place, Sasuke." He said to no one. "Even I could only keep the skies blue for so long. Sorry I couldn't do more." Naruto sighed, Sasuke would be coming soon, best have a smile ready for him.

For soon, even he wouldn't be able to reach his friend.

~.~.~.~.~

Gaara sat on the roof of his 'home', wiling the night away. During the day he was able to fill his mind with his missions and his siblings' idle chatter. Yet at night, after the village had gone to sleep, he was left staring up at the stars and wondering how things might have been.

Bright blue eyes that had glared into his, daring him to threaten his precious people.

His eyes so like Gaara's own.

"We could have been great." Gaara spoke to no one, or even anyone at all. If only they would listen.

Naruto had been the first to acknowledge him as a person, first to see the boy behind the monster. Even his siblings had been afraid of him. But Naruto looked into his eyes and _saw_. Not the monster, but the boy, afraid (yes, afraid) , lonely, and sad. Naruto had been the first person after Yashamaru that Gaara had really loved.

And now he was gone, stolen away by that bastard Uchiha.

Gaara should have killed him when he had the chance.

~.~.~.~.~

Konohamaru had his first taste of death when his Grandfather died, but Sarutobi was _old_, he could have gone at any moment. Naruto's death hit the boy harder. Naruto was in the very heart of his life, so vibrant and happy.

And now he was gone.

Where did that leave him?

Naruto was a great ninja, he was strong, fast, smart, if he could be killed so easily; why did Konohamaru think he even stood a chance as a ninja? As a Hokage?

Konohamaru was ashamed of the fact that he doubted his abilities, was afraid of the possibilities, he couldn't bear Naruto seeing him like this. Konohamaru couldn't even work up the courage to go to his idol's memorial service.

Konohamaru knew he was frightening his parents and friends with his depression, but he needed to figure out where Naruto's death left him.

And what was left for him.

~.~.~.~.~

Tsunade was sleeping on her desk, recovering from a hangover, when someone entered the office through the window. She was instantly on her feet, kunai in hand. She had not gotten to be so….Experienced, by being careless. Seeing the familiar face, she holstered her weapon and sat down once again, holding her head.

Shikamaru stepped down from the window sill, and moved to stand in front of the desk. He set a small package, wrapped in light brown canvas, on her desk.

Knowing that Shikamaru wasn't much of a prankster (too troublesome) she picked up the object, knowing she wouldn't regret it. She picked up the cloth and unwrapped. A small brass key fell into her palm.

"Where was it?" she asked the boy, knowing instantly what she held.

"The Fourth's monument. In his eye." The Chuunin sounded amused.

"How in the world did he manage to do that and not get caught by the guards?" Tsunade wondered aloud. Ever since a civilian had hurled themselves off of the third's head and died the Hokage monument had been off limits to anyone under the level of Chuunin.

Shikamaru shrugged. "Naruto has always been troublesome. You might want to summon the others before you open the box. Iruka might go psycho and stab you." Shikamaru draped himself in one of the plush armchairs in front of her desk and, to all appearances, went to sleep.

Tsunade sighed and asked an ANBU to summon the people who mattered to her office.

And then got Shizune to bring her something for her raging headache.

~.~.~.~.~

Once everyone was assembled, Tsunade took the box from the safe, behind a pleasant painting of a boat, and set it on her desk. Shizune had taken a wet rag to it revealing it to be an old jewelry box; the bright paint had worn away in places to show the dented metal surface.

Everyone held their breath as the Hokage put the small key into the lock, turning it.

The mechanism creaked as the tumblers turned, the box popping open.

Inside were photographs. Once showed a young Naruto and the Sandaime, another a black and white rendition of the Fourth. Yet another was the picture Naruto had tried to get for his ninja registration, with him all painted white and red. Also were newspaper clippings, of important events in Konoha. Another picture showed Naruto with Mr. Ichiraku and his daughter, all of them smiling.

Underneath all these was a Leather-bound book, with the words: "The Life and times of Uzumaki Naruto" on the cover.

All of the assembled people looked around at each other, startled at what they had found.

~.~.~.~.~

**You guys are never going to believe this, I'm telling the honest truth here, no lies from my mouth, well not to you guys.**

**So I write every chapter out before typing it up. I like to call these first drafts 'Crap-drafts'. I keep them in a folder I carry around with me -everywhere-. **

**So, I came home and I was untying my bear of a dog, (he's a malamute, his name is Raejii) and I –drop- everything in my arms, textbooks, notebooks, my copy of Eragon and, as fate hates me, the completed Crap draft of this chapter.**

**I didn't notice.**

**So, an hour later, after I had eaten dinner, and sat down in my big comfy computer chair, I'm leafing through my stuff, looking for crap-draft to start typing it up.**

**Nowhere to be found.**

**Then, because I am oh so smart I realized what must have happened, so I raced outside.**

**And in the darkening winter evening, there my **_**adorable**_** dog is, chewing on the chapter.**

**There you have it folks, my **_**dog ate my chapter.**_

**I swear I'm not lying.**

**And as I'm horrible with remembering things I had to restart the whole thing. So if this chapter is disappointing in any way, blame Raejii, my completely adorable puppy.**


	8. A Glimpse

**I apologize for this chapter being late. I haven't had much spare time to write, what with Thanksgiving and being forced to go to family reunions. Also Semester Finals are fast approaching. (DUNDUNDUN!!!!) But if you have time please check out my Bleach oneshot fic on my profile. It is called 'Facets' and I will update it whenever I find I don't have the time to update this Fic. **

**This chapter be dedicated to 'mainightmare3' for their splendiferously awesome guess of the location of the key. (GO MAI!!) I'd like to take this moment to point out that I am still quite poor. I don't even have enough to buy the bandy-candy anymore.**

**This chapter hurts my soul.**

**Re-cap:** Underneath all these was a Leather-bound book, with the words: "The Life and times of Uzumaki Naruto" on the cover.

All of the assembled people looked around at each other, startled at what they had found.

**~.~.~.~.~**

For a moment, no one said anything, no one moved, then Tsunade opened the book, running her fingers down the first page of small, careful handwriting. Then she began to read.

~.~.~.~

_October 10__th__-Year of the Rooster_

_My name is Naruto, and apparently I am a monster._

_I just turned seven years old today, and for my birthday they kicked me out of the orphanage._

_It is very cold for October. I must find shelter before night fall; that is when the villagers start the festival._

_October 12__th__- Year of the Rooster_

_I have taken shelter near the Ichiraku Ramen stand, the owner's daughter is kind to me, she gave me a pair of her old shoes. They are warm enough and, since I didn't have any to begin with, I do not mind that they are pink._

_This writing thing is new to me. It has opened up a whole new world; signs books, magazines, I can read them all._

_I cannot say how I've learned these new skill, I just woke up one morning knowing how to read and write, so I decided to keep this notebook I found in the trash, and use it to keep a record of my life. For anyone who cares._

_October 20__th__ – Year of the Rooster_

_I found an old knapsack in a dumpster behind a home, along with an orange jumpsuit much too large for me. I shall put the suit in the bag along with this book for when I get bigger._

_Mr. Ichiraku and his daughter are nice people. If I help around the shop, cleaning and the like they feed me ramen._

_I love Ramen._

_I start at the academy soon, the ninja academy, I mean. The academy was mandatory for every child, even if they don't want to be a ninja. They have to take at least a year to get the basic defense skills and to learn simple math._

_The academy is also free, so it keeps me off the streets for most of the day, less chance for the villagers to hurt me._

_I wonder when the old man will realize I was no longer at the orphanage and that my allowance wasn't reaching me, hadn't been in months._

_October 25__th__ – Year of the Rooster_

_Today was my first day at the academy. I snuck into the woods behind this big building and scrubbed myself and my clothes clean with the last of my soap from the orphanage. _

Shikamaru snorted.

Everyone looked at him, curious.

"He bathed in the Nara pond." Shikamaru said while laughing. The gathering began to laugh as well. The Nara's were famous for their protectiveness of their forest, and the deer that lived in it. Naruto was extremely lucky to not have been caught. The Nara's would have been out for blood.

Tsunade continued reading.

_I got to school early, taking the chance to read through my text-scrolls, eager to learn._

_My teacher was Umino Iruka, I can tell he doesn't like me. The moment he walked into the room, and saw me he flinched._

_I pretended not to notice._

Everyone gazed at Iruka who looked down, ashamed. The younger generation didn't understand, they were just realizing how badly Naruto was treated. The older generation felt horrible for their fellow adults' actions.

_October 31__st__ – Year of the Rooster_

_I love the academy, there's so much to learn. I spend lunchtime in the library, reading through the books, able to forget my hunger in the pages._

_I loved to learn how to do things._

_I read books on poetry, grammar, romance, science fiction, and anything I could get my hands on._

_I devoured scrolls on jutsu and taijutsu theory, fixing them in my mind to practice later when I was alone. I spent every waking hour studying and practicing. I even saw the lessons in my sleep._

_My academy grades soared._

_This was my chance! If I became a great ninja I wouldn't have to live on the streets! I could pay back Ayame-nee and Mr. Ichiraku for all their help._

_I __will__ be a great ninja._

_November 1__st__ – Year of the Rooster_

_The old man finally figured out that the orphanage had gotten rid of me, and had been keeping my orphan's allowance._

_I was helping Ayame-nee in the shop when an ANBU in a weasel mask appeared. _

_The ANBU member picked me up, cradling me close, as he transported me to the Hokage's tower. I blinked, surprised at the man's gentleness. _

_It was nice._

_The ANBU member set me down in front of the old man's desk, and retreated to stand by the door._

"_Naruto, how are you?" The old man looked sad, and older than usual. I hopped up into the sofa chair stationed In front of his desk, settling myself._

"_I'm fine." I told him, getting comfy._

"_Where have you been staying?" he asked his voice sad._

_I shrugged. "It varied. Ayame-nee took care of me when she could. She gave me shoes." I lifted my feet so he could see my pink sandals. He just looked sadder._

"_I'm sorry, Naruto." He said, looking down._

_I waved off his apology. "You're a busy person, besides; I made sure to keep out of sight once night came. Well, Ayame-nee will be wondering where I am, bye Hokage-jii!" I ran out the door, closing it behind me. It slid open just a crack, and when I went to close it properly, I heard what was said inside._

"_Hokage-sama, what did the boy mean by hiding at night?" The ANBU member asked. The old man sighed._

"_The drunkards come out at night, Uchiha-san. He's no older than young Sasuke, and already so responsible." The old man said. I ran off after that. _

_I don't want anyone's sympathy._

_~.~.~.~.~_

_November 21__st__ – Year of the Rooster_

_The Hokage had issued me an apartment and personally made sure I got my orphan's allowance._

_I try to make sure I'm not seen entering or leaving my apartment. There's a window situated near my bed, perfect as an escape route. _

_Times are hard._

_My allowance is given to me at the beginning of each month, and if spent wisely, should be enough for an orphan to get by._

_I tried to keep my meals healthy, I really did, eating vegetables regularly as well as fruit, and grains, but every time I try to buy these things the prices soar. A single loaf of bread would take almost half of my allowance._

_I found that ramen was cheap, and simple to make. It also came in many flavors, so it never got boring._

_I'm worried about what I will have to do when it came time to buy weapons._

_~.~.~.~.~_

_December 23__rd__ – Year of the Rooster_

_It is freezing._

_Konoha is usually a warm city, but now, in the heart of winter, it is colder than it is at any other time in the year._

_I don't have enough money to turn on the heat, and I don't have many blankets. I've started to wear all my clothes at one time, including my orange jumpsuit. I fold the pants over my feet before putting my prized sandals on, so my toes don't freeze._

_Ayame-nee has been learning to knit, she has given me her first successful attempts. I now have a woolen cap and a nice fuzzy keep me warm._

_The academy is out for holiday. I spend my days either at home or in the warm ramen shop._

_The best times are at the Ramen stand. Mr. Ichiraku and his daughter banter and laugh, and when I'm with them, it feels as if I'm a part of their family. _

_Then I go home to the empty apartment, and I feel more alone than ever._

_~.~.~.~.~_

_December 31__st__ – Year of the Rooster_

_Today is the last day of Rooster year. Tomorrow will be the start of Dog year. I have barricaded the door with of my apartment with the never-been-used refrigerator, and locked my window. I can hear to festivities from here._

_Men and women getting drunk and partying._

_Hopefully forgetting I exist. – _

_People are banging at the door, I'll hide this book, so they don't find it._

_I'm so scared._

_~.~.~.~.~_

**God I hate myself for writing this.**

**I know Naruto is out of character and doesn't sound at all like a seven-year-old should. But I'm trying to convince myself that it's alright since the Kyuubi transferred some of his intelligence to Naruto when he gave him the ability to read and write.**

**I know, it doesn't even -sound- plausible, but I had to explain how Naruto was able to read and write -somehow-. And I highly doubt that anyone at the orphanage would have taught him.**

**So there.**

**Yes, Naruto -is- adorably sweet. I feel like I have a cavity now.**

**Might want to invest in a trip to the dentist; he's just gonna get sweeter.**

**Next chapter; have your tissues ready folks, this one's gonna be a tear-jerker.**

**(By the way: You've Just Lost the GAME!!!)**

**HaHa Rachel. **

**HaHa.**


	9. A Memory

**I do not propose or claim to own Naruto. If I owned Naruto, believe me in the fact that Sasuke would be dead, Naruto would be paired with one of the following. Gaara, Sai, Shikamaru, Neji, or even sometimes Itachi (in rare cases). Sakura would be dead as well. **

**So there.**

**None of these things have happened, and if I'm truly honest with myself, they probably never will happen. -Tear- Ah well. What's done is done; one must not linger in the past.**

**I would like to take this time to say, loud and proud, THERE WILL MOST LIKELY NOT BE ANY PAIRINGS IN THIS STORY.**

**There will be hinting though.**

**Plenty of hinting. **

**This chapter be dedicated to xXMikomiUchihaXx for her splendiferous guessage of the key's location. You were close, so I'll give it to you. Good job Mikomi!!!**

_~.~.~.~.~_

_January 2__nd__ – Year of the Dog_

_I woke up today, the muscles all over my body sore._

_I remember they came through the window, shattering it._

_I couldn't escape. One stood by the window and the fridge was blocking the door. Two of them came at me, they wore the green vests of Chunin. _

_The pain seemed to go on for hours. I faintly heard someone screaming, crying._

'_Why wasn't anyone helping that person?' I remember thinking._

_Then I realized that person was me._

_Then all was black._

_I had such a strange dream._

_I was in a tunnel, stone walls stretching on forever. In the distance I could hear water dripping. My body felt heavy as I walked forward._

_I came into a large room that stretched into darkness. One whole wall was barred off with golden prison doors. A piece of paper was stuck, halfway up, on the seam between the two._

_Red energy poured out of the darkness behind the bars. I tried to run, to flee back the way I had come, but my body was heavy, and my ears were filled with sinister laughter._

_I woke up this morning fully healed, but with sore muscles._

_~.~.~.~.~.~_

_January 4__th__ – Year of the Dog_

_School started again today and Umino-sensei was teaching us how to control chakra. I couldn't seem to get a hold of mine. I tried, and I tried but there was __so much__ of it._

_I spent hours in my apartment, cross-legged and still, my hands clasped in a seal trying to bring my chakra to heel._

_It was no use._

_My limbs begin to shake, my handwriting is barely readable, I shall go to bed, hopefully it shall be better tomorrow._

_~.~.~.~.~.~_

_January 12__th__ – Year of the Dog_

_I have started saving the extra money I have, left over from my allowance, and also money I find on the street. _

_I hope to have enough to buy weapons for when I graduate._

_My chakra control continues to evade me. It's unbearable, watching the other children advancing far past me while I'm unable to achieve so of the supposedly 'simple' tasks._

_I watch the other children, trying to see what they're doing to make it so easy for them, trying to get it right._

_Nothing worked._

_I was left behind._

_I have decided to never lie in this book. Otherwise, how can it be an accurate account?_

_So I shall tell you, little book, and I'll tell you true. _

_I begin to despair. Will I ever get it right? Am I truly useless, as the villagers say?_

_I've tried to ask Umino-sensei, but every time I try to approach, he finds a reason to leave the room. _

_It's all right, little book. He must have been hurt by the person they're mistaking me for as well._

_I wonder when they'll see that I'm __**not**__ this person._

_I hope it's soon._

_~.~.~.~.~_

_January 21__st__ – Year of the Dog_

_I came home today and found that someone had broken into my apartment. They were (thankfully) already gone, but they had left a mess in their wake._

_They had dumped my trash all over the floor and spray-painted on the walls. The shelving in the fridge had been ripped out and strewn across the floors._

_As I lie here in bed tonight, the moonlight ghosts over the walls and ceiling, illuminating words,_

'_**Monster!'**_

'_**Murderer!'**_

'_**Demon!'**_

_~.~.~.~.~.~_

_April 20__th__ – Year of the Dog_

_I haven't written in ages._

_The villagers have decided that I have been learning too quickly for their tastes._

_Every night. _

_No matter how careful I am, they find me._

_Corner me._

_Hurt me._

_And by morning the marks are gone. (Nooneknows,noonecares.)_

_Two boys in my class once got in a fight. When the teacher pulled them away from one another, they were covered in cuts and bruises. (Like mine.) I remember waiting for the marks to leave, disappear._

_They stayed._

_For about a week I watched as the bruises flared to color, then fade away._

_I had always assumed everyone's wounds healed as quickly as mine._

_Was I really a monster? Was the healing thing what made me a monster?_

_~.~.~.~.~_

_April 25__th__ – Year of the Dog_

_The beatings continue. They often beat me into unconsciousness, so I am unable to do my school work._

_My grades suffer, and I am still unable to control my chakra. I have put chakra control on the back burner in my mine for the moment, and have moved to taijutsu and target practice. I have read all the books in the school library, so I move my lunch break to the practice dummies. I use the school's kunai, which are dull, to avoid injury. _

_Strangely, the lower my grades become, the less beatings I receive._

_It comes down to a dilemma._

_Pain or grades?_

_~.~.~.~.~_

_March 3__rd__ – Year of the Dog_

_I have decided that, even though I was not able to write this day, I will record it. I think it important._

_This day's beating was different. There was only one man. He kept screaming, "You killed my son!" and "You monster!" He kept kicking me, long after the others would have quit. But like the others, his breath was foul with alcohol._

_I curled into myself, protecting my face and neck, praying for it to end. _

_I remember thinking, 'I've never met him, how could I know his son, much less kill him?' Then I realized it must have been that 'Other Person' I keep being mistaken for._

_And, I'm ashamed to admit it, even to you, Little Book._

_For that time, I __**hated**__ that person. I hate that man. I hated __**everyone.**_

_But then I remember the Ayame-nee and Mr. Ichiraku. Hokage-jiji. And the strange girl at the academy that was always nice to me, even if she couldn't stop stuttering and turned red when I talked to her._

_I was ashamed of myself, still am. _

_I heard something snap._

_I must have blacked out, for when I woke the man was gone._

_There was pain._

_More than all the other beatings combined._

_I knew, __knew__, if I tried to move the pain would be worse._

_But I had to get home, before the man came back, or more villagers came._

_I climbed to my feet, trying not to scream. I stumbled my way out of the alleyway, my vision swimming._

_It must have been past midnight._

_There was no one on the streets, even the street lights were off._

_I wondered how I would make it back to my apartment._

_I tripped over my own feet, twisting at the last moment to land on my good arm. I bit my lip, knowing that if I cried out, Villagers would come to investigate._

_I kept walking._

_Black and white spots danced in my vision as I limped my way through the streets._

_Sweat dripped down my shoulders and my mouth was so dry. Everything had gone fuzzy._

_~.~.~.~.~_

**Yes.**

**I have no soul.**

**I am a horrible person for doing this to Naru-chan. –hides from mob-**

**I hope you had your tissues handy.**

**Reviews will be lovingly read many times over whenever I am feeling down.**

**:D**

**Author out.**


	10. An Interlude

**Hello all! -using Rachel as an angry wall of meat-**

**Now I know some of you are sharpening pitchforks and knives, as well as other pointy objects, and I just what to say that the wrath is well deserved. I am aware that I have been woefully absent in the update area, and I apologize. **

**I have decided to make my pathetic excuses optional and just let the interested parties check my profile for them.**

**ONTO THE STORY!!**

~.~.~.~.~

The sky above Team 7's training grounds was stormy and overcast, but Naruto gazed up at the sky all the same, a sad look upon his face. The training grounds had turned a bland shade of gray, with few leaves remaining green.

"I'll have to go soon." He told Sasuke quietly. "I can't stay here any longer."

"What!? No!" Sasuke cried, somehow knowing that he may never see the boy again, even though he did not truly believe that the boy was real.

"Your soul casts me out. You are overwhelmed with guilt, and your soul can no longer hold my own. But don't worry, I'll always watch over you." Naruto turned his eyes to Sasuke's and smiled a sad, sad, smile.

And for a moment, it was like the sun had shone through the gloomy clouds. (But you're not real.)

"Tell me one thing." Sasuke said, trying to hold back the urge to hold the blonde and to never let him go.

"Anything." The blonde promised, trying to redeem himself for failing the Raven.

"What was that strange power you used back then? The red chakra." (Back with silence.)

"I'll tell you a tale," Naruto said, once more smiling that sad smile. "a tale of a Man, a Village, and a Demon." The world around them warped. The two boys were standing over a gory scene. Faceless Shinobi were laying on the ground, dead or on their way there.

A massive crimson monster towered above the forest, its nine tails swinging, bringing destruction in their wake.

A giant toad stood in its path, blocking it's way to the village behind it. Atop the toad stood a man. The two (once, maybe still?) friends seemed to fly until they stood in front of the man.

"The Fourth!" Sasuke said, surprised.

"Yes. The Fourth." There was something in Naruto's voice. Bitterness, perhaps? Admiration, maybe? Who knows.

In the Fourth's arms was a blanket wrapped bundle. The Fourth hitched it a little higher, carefully, gently.

"The Fourth knew that the Kyuubi could not be killed by any mortal, so he did the only thing he could. He sealed the Demon, into the body of a child, born less than an hour before. Then the Fourth died, as such a technique was never without consequences." Naruto's voice steadily more melancholy. "His wish was for the boy, to be treated as a Hero, as a Savior, but things rarely go as planned." Naruto sighed, turning away from the scene, as it dissolved into the training grounds once again.

"So you mean you're…" Sasuke began, realizing the implications. Naruto nodded.

"And so I grew, hated by the village, never knowing what lay inside my stomach. Until the academy graduation came around."

Lightning flared in the grounds, thunder boomed, as the last green leaf fell, turning gray as it touched the ground.

"Goodbye, Sasuke. Take care of yourself." Lighting flashed again, and by the time the thunder crashed, Naruto was gone.

And Sasuke was more alone than ever.

~.~.~.~.~

This was a night of firsts.

For the first time in months he dreamed.

And for the first time in years, his dreams were not nightmares.

And for the first time he dreamed of the blonde boy.

He opened his eyes to find himself leaning against a training post in the old Uchiha compound.

"Your plan won't work you know." A voice said to his left. He turned and there was the Kyuubi boy, staring at him.

"What plan?" Itachi asked.

"Whatever plan you need the nine Tailed Demons for." The blonde said, laying back against the grass and crossing his arms beneath his head.

"Oh? And why is that?" Itachi decided to humor his consciousness, wondering when the dream would turn to chaos, like dreams were supposed to be.

"Because I'm dead." The once-Jinchuuriki said simply. "And your 'Foolish little brother' killed me." The world dissolved and as Itachi woke, the dream slipped from his memory and he was left feeling uneasy; like he had forgotten something important.

And, in fact he had.

~.~.~.~.~

Tsunade stopped reading after that passage, her hands gone white she was gripping the little book so hard. Shizune made to relieve her teacher of the precious memento before Tusnade lost control. The Fifth Hokage released the book quick enough, and seemed to calm. Then her anger re-emerging she put her fist through her desk, splitting it in half and sending paperwork flying.

"If we had known-" Neji began, then stopped himself, feeling horrible for the things he had said to Naruto, during their first fateful fight. Calling him a loser, a weakling, saying he had no idea what Neji had been through.

Neji was _wrong._

He knew now that Naruto had been the strongest person Neji had met, and he never even knew.

Iruka had taken the book, his eyes suspiciously bright, and began to read again.

~.~.~.~.~.~

**. **

**I know it's short, don't hate me. I'll get back to the pre-written materail next chapter, so hopefully things should move faster.**

**I hope I haven't lost all my readers....**

**I love you guys, really.**

**Author out.**


	11. A Secret

**Author's Note: I know the chapters are short these days, but I no longer have a study hall to write in anymore. It has now been replaced by Adult Living. o-(_)-o**

**So I apologize that the chapters will be getting shorter, and a bit more interspaced. But fear not my lovely people, I will not give up on this story, it makes me too depressed to quit it.**

**(WHY CAN"T I QUIT YOU!?)**

**And the reviewers are too wonderful of people to leave hanging. .....-Reaches over and knocks on wood-**

**So....**

**TO THE INTERNET!!!!**

**(You've just lost the game.)**

_~.~.~.~.~_

_March 12__th__ – Year of the Dog_

_When I woke I immediately became of the pain in my body, and I knew that it would not be wise to move._

_The second thing I noticed was that my surroundings were unfamiliar. Ignoring my first observation I tried to sit up but a hand on my chest prevented me._

"_Careful, you'll agitate your injuries." I flinched, waiting for a blow. "You're alright." The voice said soothingly. "I'm not going to harm you." I warily looked up to see the weasel-masked ANBU looking down at me._

_I looked over at my broken arm and found it splinted, and all my other injuries tended to. "Thank you Mask-san." I smiled up at the ANBU and sat up slowly, minding my injuries. _

"_Will you be alright?" The older man asked, somehow I knew he wasn't talking about my injuries. I nodded at his questions, having looked over my injuries and saw that they were already healing. "Do you wish me to inform Lord Hokage of your treatment?" I shook my head _

"_No, there's not need, he's a busy person. Besides, it's not their fault, not really. They've obviously confused me with someone else, someone bad. Maybe I look like him, or something….." I yawned wide, feeling my jaw pop. _

"_You should sleep some more, I'll take you home." I nodded again and fell off to sleep, somehow, I trusted him._

_~.~.~.~.~_

_April 3__rd__ – Year of the Dog_

_It's gotten warmer now, I have put the cap and scarf and my jumpsuit away in my bag. _

_I've been saving all my spare money from my orphan's allowance as well as the small change that I find on the ground. I hope it'll be enough when it comes time to buy weapons. _

_Though, knowing my luck, they'll get inexplicably higher priced when I try to buy them._

~.~.~.~.~

Iruka paused in his reading, his hands shaking and tears clouding his eyes. He carefully marked the page with a piece of Tsunade's errant paperwork, and wiped his tears with a handkerchief supplied by Shizune.

"All right, why were the villagers so horrible to Naruto? Tell us now." Kiba asked, his fangs bared in a angry scowl. Akamaru growled as well.

The adults looked around at the determined and battle hardened faces, trying to decide whether or not to tell them.

Trying to figure out what their reactions would be.

Tsunade raiser her head from her slouched position and stared each of them in the eye. Then she sighed. "What I am about to tell you is a Double S-class secret, you must not tell anyone outside this room." Every one nodded solemnly. "The Kyuubi was not killed, instead the Fourth sealed inside a new born child. That child was Naruto. He is the Jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi no Kitsune." She looked at the young faces before her, studying their reactions.

Neji first looked shocked, then thoughtful, then accepting. To him, many pieces fell into the puzzle that was Naruto. It explained his monstrous stamina and chakra; it also explained the demonic face he saw in Naruto's strange chakra, back when they fought in the finals.

Kiba was angry, angry that Naruto had held back in their fight, angry that he would never get a rematch, angry that Sasuke had killed his friend.

Hinata didn't care. She still saw Naruto as the sun. Bright, warm, and wonderful. She had loved him. He had inspired her to work harder to change herself. Who would she look up to now?

Shino was quietly astonished. He had thought that Naruto was disliked because he was loud, and a prankster. He had scorned Naruto because the boy was so oblivious and, at times, stupid. But Naruto knew true loneliness. Shino had thought his family alone in the villager's fear. The insects inside him being too frightening to them. And even the Aburame hated Naruto. Shino was ashamed of his clan.

Chouji and Shikamaru shared a look, they had already known. Shikamaru, as Naruto's squad leader was informed ahead of time and he had immediately told his best friend. Neither of them cared either way. Naruto had the Kyuubi sealed in him, who cared, he was still Naruto.

Ino on the other hand felt horrible for the way she had treated the boy and the names she had called him. She faintly recalled a Naruto of years past, rarely smiling, always reading, and wondered why no one questioned when he had come to school one day, grinning like an idiot, and speaking so brashly. _'Maybe it was just easier to believe the lie.'_ She thought.

Lee and Tenten were solemn, Lee more so than they had seen him in years, Tenten's hand was clenched in Lee's, and their eyes were overly bright.

"We'll pick this up tomorrow, everyone go get some rest." Tsunade said, taking the book out of Iruka's hands and placing it in a drawer, locking it with a key she then slipped down the front of her shirt.

Everyone left then, going back to their apartments, homes, complexes, or houses. The younger generation now looked at their family members, and couldn't help but wonder if they had been one of Naruto's abusers. If they had called him names and drove him away.

And they found they could not look them in the eyes without wanting to scream as loud as they could.

~.~.~.~.~

**GASPETH!!!**

**Now they know!**

**The dark secret is out! And it smells like dirty laundry!**

**HAHAHAHAHA!!**

**Sorry, I am high on Valentine's chocolate.**

**Now you must be thinking, 'Wonderful-person-who-writes-this-story, why would you eat Chocolate when it makes you phisically ill?' **

**Well, Supercalafragasexy-people-who-read-and-or-review, this is the only answer I have to give.**

**"IT'S TOO DARN GOOD!!" -shakes fist- **

**Author out.~**

**-"Fun sized candy bar? _Really?!_ 'Fun-sized? The only fun I'm going to have with this is smearing it all over your windows when you shut the door in my face!"**


	12. A Determination

**Hey guys, sorry this is so late, but ACT's are coming up and I'm beginning to miss my study hall period. Now I'll just get out of your way so you can read it.**

~.~.~.~.~

It went unsaid that they would re-convene. They all knew that the others would be there in the morning. They also knew that none of them would have slept peacefully.

The dark rings under eyes were something they all had in common that day, born from an uneasy night of dark wonderings.

And the knowledge that many such nights were to come.

Thus they settled around the cold room, and Tsunade sat behind the desk that would never hold a boy whose smile was that of hope.

_~.~.~.~.~_

_April 26__th__ – Year of the Dog_

_The beatings continue, though none are as bad as March 3__rd__'s. Though I suppose, as the past tends to repeat, it's only a matter of time._

_Every day I go to the academy and smile my fake smile, pretending nothing's wrong._

_And, so far, no one has noticed the truth, which is that I am breaking inside._

_~.~.~.~.~_

"He's right." Ino said, her arm around Sakura's shaking shoulders. "None of us noticed. Not even when it was right under our noses."

Shikamaru raised his head from where it had fallen into his hands. "I remember the way he was before. Naruto didn't smile as much, but when he did, it was like a ray of sun in a storm. " Shikamaru looked over at his slightly bandaged friend Choujii who nodded. "Over time he grinned more than he smiled. If you looked close, you could see the grin was forced. It always made me wonder, what was happening behind that grinning façade." Shikamaru's head fell back into his hands, making him look tired beyond his usual laziness.

Iruka began to read again.

_~.~.~.~.~_

_June 1__st__ – Year of the Dog_

_I write this passage as my chest feels on fire. The pain is horrible and I feel as if I could pass out at any moment. _

_Sometimes I want to scream at the villagers, plead with them._

"_Look at me!"_

_Even when they pain my skin black and blue, and break my bones; even when my blood stains the earth red, they do not look at __**me.**_

_They see a monster where there should be a child. It makes me wonder who could have done something so horrible to make these villagers hate them even now. Make them blind to the fact that I am a __**child**__ and not a 'demon'. _

_One day, I'll stand in the light and they will have to look at me._

_And they will see me, Naruto Uzumaki._

_I__** will **__be Hokage._

_~.~.~.~.~.~_

"How did he do it?" Neji asked when Iruka paused for breath.

"Do what?" Kakashi asked him.

"How was he still able to go on fighting for us when we treated him so horribly? How was he able to love this village enough to protect it with his life?" No one had an answer for the boy who had been taught to defy fate.

"I guess we'll never know." Shizune said quietly.

~.~.~.~.~

_June 5__th__ – Year of the Dog_

_This is it._

_I'm done._

_I give up._

_They want me to stop doing so well in the academy? Fine. I will._

_My grades will plummet till barely passing. I'll make sure no one sees how smart I am._

_From this day on, a mask will shield me._

_I become an idiot, a prankster, a dead last._

_They win, they have broken me._

_All that money save, all that effort wasted. Why me?_

_~.~.~.~.~.~_

_June 15__th__ – Year of the Dog_

_No one seems to notice the difference. I still spend my lunch in the library, but all other times I act like the idiot I intend to make myself out to be._

_No one questions._

_No one notices._

_I stopped doing my work well, but I study twice as hard to make up for it._

_I have started to feel __**other**__ people's chakra._

_I am surprised that the other children seem to have so little._

_Maybe that's why I'm having so much trouble harnessing my Chakra! I have too much of it, and too little control! Theoretically I should be able to use it correctly if I just get rid of some of it._

_~.~.~.~.~_

_July 2__nd__ – Year of the Dog_

_I have mastered the Henge!_

_I can now successfully transform myself! All I have to do is get rid of a bunch of my chakra beforehand. This discovery __**proves**__ I'm able to do it, I just don't' have enough control to do it with all my chakra present yet. I'll keep working on it._

_A new series of books has swept Konoha, I see many men around with the orange books._

_I wonder what they are._

_~.~.~.~.~_

_August 10__th__ – Year of the Dog_

_I have found that pulling pranks on people is a great way to strengthen my idiot mask. Everyone believes that I am a fool, and it is better this way._

_The pranks ranged from a simple bucket of water over the door, to a tack on a chair or a frog in a desk._

_My fellow classmates grow to find me stupid and annoying, which is fine with me. Who knew what their parents would do if they thought their children were becoming friends with me._

_I shudder at the thought._

_The only person I never pranked was the shy little girl named Hinata. Hinata was to__** everyone. **__Even me._

_There's this kid in my class, his name is Shino. Most of the other kids avoid him; they said he had bugs living in him. I made sure to smile at him whenever I saw him._

_I think if I had something living inside __me__, I would want people to be nice to me too._

_I have realized that, eventually, this book will run out of pages. I will have to figure out what to do with it then._

_~.~.~.~.~_

**Better break out the tissues folks, the next one's gonna be a doozy.**

**I got all teary-eyed myself writing it.**

**My Spanish teacher will never look at me the same again.**

**Ciao,**

**Piper**


	13. An Ending

…**.So…. Been awhile huh? **

**Yeah…Sorry about that.**

**-Crickets-**

**You've probably moved to a fic that updates more promptly haven't you?**

**Can't blame you, it has been about a year.**

**Well, I'll let you get to it then. If you're still here and all.**

**~.~.~.~.~**

_March 16__th__- Year of the Rat_

_It has been awhile since I wrote in this journal, and this is the last page, tomorrow I will hide it and find a new book to write in. _

_Nothing of note happened in the year of the boar: the villagers still attack me, though I am getting more skillful at avoiding them, my classmates think I'm some idiot prankster, and my grades are still in the toilet, and I've failed the academy three times, since I entered early I'm now with my own grade level. _

_But I'm alive._

_I'm alive and I'm learning, and I'm getting better at Chakra control._

_Every time the graduation exam is the Bunshin Jutsu._

_I can't create a Bunshin to save my life._

_I've mastered the Henge and the Kawarimi. My aim has improved so that I can now hit the target fairly close to the center._

_I've taken to reading novels, any that I can find. I want to know how I'm supposed to act around people, how to better my fool mask. I have learned that when someone tags a catchphrase onto the end of their speech then that person is usually ridiculed for it. I myself have taken to saying, "Dattebayo" at the end of my speeches. I suppose I chose that phrase because the thing I want most in the world is for someone to believe in me, to acknowledge me. Everyone seems suitably irritated when I say it, I guess it works._

_Tomorrow I will pull the greatest prank ever: I will graffiti the Hokage monument and use that time to hide this journal. Later on I'll come back, using my improved skills to put the position of the next journal._

_So to anyone who reads this journal, if someone actually does, I wish you luck in finding the next journal, for I'm sure I'll find somewhere amazing to hide it._

_Uzumaki Naruto_

_~.~.~.~.~_

Iruka turned the blank end pages to get to the back cover, where, sure enough, a riddle was written in slightly neater handwriting.

"Where demon fought and fell,

For the snow bird's blood did spill,

Revenge was the reason he fought,

Corruption's end was what he sought.

When he had no strength left to run

We buried them both beneath the sun."

The office went silent, the only sound was the soft sound the book made when Iruka closed it.

"Go home." Tsunade said to everyone in the room, waving away their protests. "Get a good night's sleep, and tomorrow, we'll crack this next riddle." They all left through their preferred exit, some through the door, some through the window.

"Jiriaya". Tsunade spoke softly, knowing the man was lingering. "Change the names, and publish it. I want it distributed all throughout Konoha book stores, at least. Konoha will know if its crimes." Tsunade opened the drawer in her desk, pulling out a bottle of sake and pouring herself a cup.

"Hai, Hokage-sama." Jiraiya's voice was somber as he watched the only woman he truly cared for begin to drink herself to oblivion. He turned to go, not wanting to see her do this to herself, but unable to stop her.

He left before she started to cry, but he knew that she was. He always knew.

Always.

~.~.~.~.~

Sasuke stood in a dark room, full of the dead, the hundred shinobi sent to oppose him were all slaughtered, strewn across the room almost comically.

Sasuke just looked over them coldly, making sure they wouldn't spring to their feet again. Then he turned towards the door and left the training room.

Orochimaru and Kabuto waited for him outside, disgusting smirks on their faces.

"Well done, Sasuke-kun." Kabuto said smiling and reaching out for his shoulder to pat it, immediately a kunai was at his throat.

"Don't touch me." The Uchiha monotoned.

"No need to be so shy, Sasuke-kun." Orochimaru said, smirking. "After all we've known each other for a month now; I think we're past all that." Sasuke stared at the Sannin for a moment, then turned and returned to his room.

His room was dark, cold, silent; just the way he liked it.

Though some part of him screamed for bright, warm, and loud; but he had left those behind with all the other things he'd loved.

He was all that was left.

Sasuke walked into his bathroom, removing his bloody clothes as he went. He turned the water on as hot as it could go, filling the white-tiled room with choking steam. The water turned his pale skin red, as he scrubbed the blood and gore off. His raven hair plastered against his face and hair, falling out of its normal style.

Suddenly Sasuke slammed his fist into the tiling, shattering the pristine porcelain. Shards of the tiles cut open his hand, sending a wave of crimson swirling down the drain.

He stayed like that for a while, his forearms resting against the wall, and his head hanging limply between them. Water dripped from his face as the spray slowly turned from scalding hot to lukewarm, and lukewarm to ice cold. He shut the faucet off, and wrapped himself in a towel, draping another around his head and he rubbed his hair dry.

He wiped the mirror off with the towel that now rested around his neck and stumbled back when his eyes met blue in the mirror.

They were bright and vibrant, full of the wonder of life. They were Naruto's.

From before.

Then the reflection _stilled_, eyes closing and breath leaving (oh god). He reached out, desperate to shake the boy awake to get him to _move. _His hand only touched cold glass, the picture abruptly disappearing, only his own, wide-eyed, face in the mirror.

The mirror shattered with only the slightest of touches from Sasuke, the glass splintering into a thousand pieces, forming a melody as they fell to the floor.

"Come back!" Sasuke screamed to the boy who had always been so much stronger than himself. Sasuke let himself fall to his knees in despair for this last time before he sealed away his emotions for good.

There was not an answer he could hear, but Naruto was always with him.

The ghost draped his arms around his best friend, and killer's, shoulders, holding the boy (I'm here, I'm here) to his own insubstantial body, wanting to comfort him. But Sasuke couldn't hear him, couldn't feel him.

"_Oh, Sasuke…"_

**~.~.~.~.~**

**So, yeah, the reason I haven't been updated in for-freaking-ever is that I reached a stale point in the story and all my plot bunnies move on to better places…(I.E. the shippuden part of the story.)**


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